SECRETS TO DISCIPLINING YOUR TODDLER

At what age should you begin to discipline your child?  When your one year old throws a tantrum, what should you do?

While methods such as time-outs and/or taking away privileges can be very effective ways of discipline, they don't work well on toddlers (they aren't old enough to understand cause and effect).  The ability to reason with a toddler just isn't there yet.  But this is a very good time to start teaching them right from wrong and introducing them to boundaries.

Try some of these strategies:

1. Be Consistent - You may think that allowing your crying child (to have that piece of candy before dinner) just this one time won't be a big deal.  But giving into your child's demands encourages them to throw other tantrums later, expecting the same result.  It is very important to set limits and continue to follow through over and over again.  It may take a little bit of strong parenting from you at first, but in the long run, it will make your life much easier and be more beneficial to your child.  It is also important that you and your spouse are on the same page as far as rules and discipline.  If not, this sends mixed messages to your child and causes confusion.
2. Stay Positive - Saying "No!" to your child over and over again can actually cause them to tune you out.  Or it can even make them begin saying the word to you.  Try to save the word "No!" for safety issues.  If you see your child going for an electrical outlet, use "No!".  But if the behavior isn't dangerous try rephrasing without using "No!".  For example, my kids love taking their shoes off in the car.  But I don't like them to because then you have to put them right back on when you get to where you are going.  So I simply ask them to wait until we get to our place of destination before taking them off.  I know this can be a difficult one because "No!" just comes so naturally.  It can be a hard habit to break but if you are a little bit conscientious about it, it may become easier.  To add to "staying positive", I would also like to suggest making sure that when you child does something good, be sure to praise them for it.  We spend so much time trying to correct our children when they are doing something wrong, that we can forget to acknowledge them for making good choices as well.  I REALLY try to do this every chance I get (no matter what the age)!
3. Show Them the Right Way - When correcting your children, show them the correct way of doing something.  Children are like sponges and learn a lot just by watching  what we do.  Often times they learn much better by watching than just by listening to what we are saying.  For example, my toddler loves to look at books.  But she can be very rough sometimes with the pages.  So I show her the correct and gentle way of turning the pages so they don't get torn.
4. Try a Distraction - When your child is misbehaving, try to resist the urge to raise your voice and yell.  I know that can be tough, but try redirecting his/her attention.  Often times if you can put their attention onto something else, this can correct their behavior almost immediately.
5. Praise Good Behavior - I know that I mentioned this in #2, but I think it bares repeating.  One of my daughters has a bad habit of wanting to come home from school and try to avoid doing her homework.  Well the routine is for them to come home, eat a snack and then get right on the homework.  But I was always having to get on to her about this.  Then one day, she sat down and began doing her homework without me having to say anything to her at all.  I was so proud of her and made sure to tell her that.  She took a lot of pride in that and has been much better about it since then.

I hope some of these strategies will help you.  I am constantly researching and reading to help myself to be a better parent.  I am not perfect but a work in progress, as I guess I will always be.